Dear Jacqui:
I am a 27 year old woman and I am having pain during sex. I've had this problem since I lost my virginity. In the last year I have only had sex twice because of this problem. My partner noticed a difference he told me I felt tighter this time than last time. I am very embarrassed and feel I can't speak with my doctor. I have tried everything for lubrication that doesn't seem to be the problem. Can you help me? Debbie

Dear Debbie:
I know it is not easy to discuss these delicate matters with anybody. Many women experience pain during intercourse. Sometimes it is due to an infection or a health condition they are not aware of. In other cases it turns out that their vaginal canal is on the short side, and during intercourse their partner's penis pushes into the cervix which causes the woman pain. Maybe that's true for you.

Since you have always had pain during intercourse, you naturally expect each experience to be hurtful and I am sure that you become tighter and more rigid which is very understandable. In fact, your muscles actually contract which makes penetration even harder and more painful. I know my suggestion is not what you might want to hear, but remember, I am concerned about you which is why I take the time to write to you.

Please see a doctor, maybe a woman gynecologist would be easier to trust. It is so important to find out why you experience pain before the problem becomes even more serious. There is an outside chance that you have a vaginal or other health condition infection that has not been diagnosed.

Remember, a woman gynecologist can relate to you, she is built the same way, and she sees many other women with your kind of problems. I hope you follow my advice. Sexuality is about pleasure not pain. I know you can be helped.

Jacqui

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