Peter and Sally, both previously divorced, planned the perfect vacation to recapture the romance of their honeymoon. Both work, both have another family, so time together was always scarce.They longed for togetherness and intimacy. The trip turned into a fiasco! The first "romantic" hotel was so bare and sparse, it felt more like a hospital waiting room than a setting for love.

Next came the charming country inn. The room was a small, the tub too snug for togetherness. Sally had a long, relaxing bath; Peter used the awkward hand shower. Oops! Guess who caught a vaginal infection and was out of commission for days? The last stop was the wonderful villa with a view that went forever; rolling vineyards, birdsong, pine trees. However, heaven lost its spell when a family with three noisy kids moved in the room next door.

Here are my suggestions to prevent problems and put romance into your vacation:

Personalize your hotel room.
Bunches of flowers, a bowl of fruit, candles and even bringing a pink light bulb to replace the glaring light can turn a barren room into a charming love nest.

A little spying ahead of time.
Ask the head housekeeper before making your reservation. She knows which room has a view, a balcony and offers total privacy. Remember, the reservation staff must fill every room. Require photographs of rooms and lounging areas. Even small hotels send you pictures and information over the Internet.

Be prepared to spend a lot more time together than at home. Discuss ahead of time what your expectations are, what each of you would like to do and see. If you love the arts and want to visit museums but your partner is a hiker, challenged to climb every mountain, accommodate each other, so you both end up having a great time.

Plan together.
Establish a budget. If you blow it one day, spend less the next. Many vacations end in bitter arguments over spending too much on this or too little on that. Use your own splurge money for things that are important to you but not to your significant other.

If you've joined a group, get away for private time, even if every dinner with the group is included, find your own intimate bistro. Or skip the program for an entire day and enjoy each other.Remember how you used to hold hands and hug in public? A vacation is the perfect time to rediscover each other and make the relationship bloom all over again.

Jacqui

You can mail your own question to Jacqui at: PO Box 491341, Los Angeles, CA 90049. Or E-mail her at: info@veryprivate.com For more information visit: www.veryprivate.com. We never reveal or give out names or addresses. © 2003 Brandwynne Corp. All rights reserved.