Dear Jacqui,
I've been married for 5 years and have not found the answer to my problem. My husband and I have been dealing with his impotence since we got married. We didn't have sex until we were married. I think, however, my own inhibitions have contributed to his condition. What's a wife to do?
Ana

Dear Ana,
I can well understand that your inhibitions may have led to your initial frustrations but...it doesn't have to end that way.

First of all, I suggest taking the pressure off each other and just enjoy what you can, even if it's just kissing or hugging for the time being. Most of all I want you to learn about your fears, talk about them openly and caringly. You have a great love for each other it's your individual fears and maybe unrealistic expectations that all can be simply resolved.

Love and sexuality is a learning experience that starts with trust, self-acceptance and the courage to be who you are and want to be and then share yourself with each other. You might wish to attend a couples' workshop. There are many that discuss sexuality and all its complex issues and techniques. I also recommend a book called Passionate Marriage.

Read it together and discuss it often. I think it might help. With best wishes.

Jacqui




	"Impotence, what's a wife to do?" Dear Jacqui, I've been married for 5 years and have not found the answer to my problem. My husband and I have been dealing with his impotence since we got married. We didn't have sex until we were married. I think, however, my own inhibitions have contributed to his condition. What's a wife to do? Ana Dear Ana, I can well understand that your inhibitions may have led to your initial frustrations but...it doesn't have to end that way. First of all, I suggest taking the pressure off each other and just enjoy what you can, even if it's just kissing or hugging for the time being. Most of all I want you to learn about your fears, talk about them openly and caringly. You have a great love for each other it's your individual fears and maybe unrealistic expectations that all can be simply resolved. Love and sexuality is a learning experience that starts with trust, self-acceptance and the courage to be who you are and want to be and then share yourself with each other. You might wish to attend a couples' workshop. There are many that discuss sexuality and all its complex issues and techniques. I also recommend a book called Passionate Marriage. Read it together and discuss it often. I think it might help. With best wishes. Jacqui Copyright 2002 Brandwynne Corporation. All rights reserved. Thank you for your trust.

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